Let’s be honest, most of us, at some time or
another haven’t had our act together.
It’s tough.
We can have a lot of commitments, whether it’s work, children, family, goals,
health, fitness…
The list
goes on. Having everything together isn’t always easy.
However,
not having our act together can cause more stress and anxiety.
Which leads
to health issues, including digestion. Leaving people needing to get their act
together literally AND figuratively.
Which I,
personally, learnt the hard way. The worst part of my story was that I “thought” I did have
it all together. I mean I was 20, I clearly knew everything. Until I wasn’t digesting food. It was like my
body became intolerant to the rubbish I was feeding it.
My work
helping people get their act together didn’t start with my story.
It actually
started when I was working as a nutritionist.
What I learnt
from being a nutritionist is it isn’t simply changing someone’s diet, no. It’s
more than that. A lot more. You’re looking at the reasons why people eat
certain foods. Why they don’t want to change when they say they want to. Then
breaking down all their excuses on why they can’t change. Trust me when I say this, being a
nutritionist is not a simple undertaking.
Now I’m a
professional Get Your Act Together-er.
Here is what I have learnt from not only getting my act together but also from helping other people get their act together.
People make excuses for why they can’t change.
So here are Seven Ways People Prevent Themselves From Getting Their Act Together.
1) Forgetting To Say No.
I genuinely
believe people have hardwired their brains into thinking that saying no is
physically damaging to them. I know I did it to myself.
Think about
all the times you have wanted to say no. However, instead of saying no, you
said yes. Usually, because you have come up with a narrative of all the bad
things that will happen if you say no.
Maybe
because you think Tom, Dick and Harry will curse the day you were born for
saying no.
Saying yes
all the time, especially when you want to say no is wasting your time.
Think about all the ways you could be getting your act together if you just said no.
2) Distractions
This is one
of the biggest ones.
There are
so many distractions around us. Whether it’s TV, social media, the internet,
life drama etc.
There is
always something to do.
Getting
your act together takes time. It takes self-reflection. How are you are going
to do that when there are all these shiny objects floating around.
Getting
your act together isn’t comfortable. You have to look at hard truths about
yourself. For a lot of people that discomfort pushes them to distract
themselves. It’s as if they are trying to escape their reality.
Making it
IMPOSSIBLE to get their act together.
3) Lack Of Accountability.
If there
isn’t anyone around that is a good influence guiding you, then you’re screwed.
You have no one to be accountable to.
Being
accountable to yourself is where you want to be, however, for a lot of people,
it’s tough. You have to wade through a river rubbish to be able to put it all
together.
I recently
wrote a blog on Why Being Responsible Is A Super Power. It really is.
If you can hold yourself accountable and take responsibility, it becomes a lot
easier to get your act together.
Taking accountability is uncomfortable. You have to own all your mistakes. Recognise you are your biggest hurdle and find a way to overcome.
4) You’re Future “Me-ing” It.
Do you know
those times where you can see something that you need to fix? Or a job that
needs to be done and you say “I’ll do it later’?
Yeah,
that’s future me-ing the problem. I can guarantee that future you, strongly
dislikes past you.
Not
“dealing” with a problem/job/deadline/ bill whatever it is in the
moment is adding more rubbish you need to get together.
Sometimes getting your act together is actually removing tasks and not adding to them.
5) The Stories We Tell Ourselves.
I see this
time and time again.
People tell
themselves stories about why they can’t get their act together. Whether it’s
quitting a job, asking for a raise, leaving a toxic relationship or joining a
gym.
The
fictitious stories you tell yourself can render you inactive and prevent you
from moving forward.
This one
can be a tough one to overcome. Sometimes the stories we tell ourselves, we
have been telling ourselves since we were kids.
Breaking that cycle can be difficult.
6) You’re Saying “I Don’t Have Time”.
Who here
has visited this land? I know I have, many times. It’s where dreams go to die.
Look, I get
it. We are all busy. I agree. Sometimes, on occasions, we simply don’t have
times.
However,
let’s quickly review number one in this article. Forgetting to say no.
If people
can’t break this cycle and take an honest look at their time, then it’s going
to be really hard to get their act together.
A lot of people I work with have issues with control. Anxiety can come from a lack of control. However, letting go and letting people help you to give you more time is essential.
7) You’re Living In The “When I”.
This one is
so common.
I have met
clients, friends, family members, acquaintances that say this all the time.
For
instance:
I’ll join
the gym “when I” lose a little more weight.
I’ll quit
my (toxic) job “when I” reach x, y, z.
I’ll spend
more time with friends “when I” have more time.
I’ll quit
drinking “when I” have finalised x, y, z. ‘
You know
what I told myself a lot? I’ll sort out my anxiety “when I” don’t
have digestive issues. This literally prevented me from getting my act together
literally and figuratively.
If you’re
always waiting for the perfect moment to change, you’re wasting your time.
For more
information about stress, anxiety, burnout, digestion or getting your act
together, head over to my blogs and video section.
Or if you
would like to get in touch, feel free to reach me here.
“Choose a job you love, and you will never have to work a day in your life.”
Confucius
Many people grow up hearing that positivity is key. Unfortunately, as we grow up, it can be harder and harder to be positive. Life has many snags and issues that we all must learn to deal with. Work can be an especially stressful place, with deadlines and clients and co-workers.
5 TIPS TO A ADD POSITIVE ENERGY TO YOUR WORKPLACE:
STAY ORGANIZED
Much work stress comes from deadlines that were missed and disorganization. Keep a color coded calendar of all work events, deadlines, meetings, and client updates. Being able to consult the calendar of all daily events will make work less stressful.
PRACTICE EFFECTIVE COMMUNICATION
Most people have negative communication with one another because the communication is not effective. Send emails updating colleagues on the things that each person must be aware of and while speaking in person, genuinely listen to one another rather than being abrupt. Better communication produces positive communication and positive feelings.
SMILE
Many people do not make a habit of smiling and looking cheerful at work, but looking approachable will get you much different results than looking standoffish. Practicing smiling and having a more upbeat attitude makes it likely that other workers will approach you with the same attitude. Clients also prefer working with someone who is professional, yet friendly.
MAKE SMALL GOALS
Most of the time people don’t feel accomplished at work, which leads to feelings of negativity. Setting small goals that lead to larger accomplishments will help keep you focused will help keep your attitude positive and upbeat.
LEAVE WORK AT THE OFFICE
If you have a stressful job or a job that can be brought home, it can become easy for your life to be overwhelmed with work. If you vow to leave work at home and spend your personal time with family, friends, and your own hobbies, work will appear much less like an albatross and must more like a part of life.
New details have emerged about the UAE’s National Wellbeing Strategy 2031 from the office of the Prime Minister, Sheikh Mohammed bin Rashid.
The strategy, approved by the UAE Cabinet on Tuesday, set out a comprehensive 10-year plan that aims to make the Emirates a world leader in quality of life.
Ninety projects, to be implemented by various government bodies, and five new centres were launched to support this goal.
The strategy established:
A National Wellbeing Observatory to track the UAE’s progress against global wellbeing indicators.
A Future Generations Wellbeing Academy that will train and upskill government employees to adapt to this “new approach to government work”.
A National Wellbeing Council to manage the implementation of the strategy and ensure government bodies are aligned in their approach.
Community Design for Wellbeing Centres where communities can design policies and initiatives to boost wellbeing.
And a National Lab for Behavioral Sciences where scientific and practical approaches to improve wellbeing in policies will be developed.
These centres, coupled with the 90 initiatives, hope to improve the physical and mental health of the population, social relationships, education, and the efficiency of government services.
Ohood Al Roumi, the UAE’s Minister of State for Happiness and Wellbeing, said the strategy represented a “new government approach focusing on individuals in the UAE.”
She said policies and initiatives would be designed considering the wellbeing and happiness of people first and that these would build on the work of the National Program for Happiness and Wellbeing launched in 2016.
The UAE Government’s new strategy will target three main levels: the Nation, Community and Individuals.
On the national level, the strategy aims to ensure a prosperous economy; efficient and effective government in the fields of education, health, social services, security, safety and the rule of law; government work flexibility, reliability, efficiency and transparency; the building of vibrant livable cities and communities; the establishment of a sustainable lifestyle that preserves national resources; support for a vibrant and diverse national culture by organising cultural and recreational activities; maintenance of national identity and cultural diversity, and fostering a connected community.
On the community level it aims to foster cohesive and stable families with strong positive relations and robust values; a co-operative community characterised by strong ties and positive values; and promote Emirati culture and identity. It also aims to create positive environments for work and education, empower individuals and provide them with opportunities for growth and development, and focusing on building secure, meaningful, positive digital communities.
And finally, at the the third level, it aims to promote active and healthy lifestyles, healthy nutrition options, good mental health, positive thinking and good life skills.
Simon Alexander Ong | Life Coach & Business Strategist
Successful leadership is about creating more leaders by empowering those that you are responsible for and creating a safe place for them to explore, experiment and improve. As Bob Burg and John David Mann noted, ‘your influence is determined by how abundantly you place other people’s interests first. Even if you don’t happen to occupy a traditional leadership position, that doesn’t mean you’re not in a position to influence others, to inspire and empower others, to be the catalyst for others’ greatness. To champion their success; to hold them up.’ Some of the characteristics of successful leadership shared in this video are that it’s not about you but those that you are in a privileged position to serve; the importance of self-awareness; and, cultivating a space and culture that places employee wellbeing and growth at its core.
Okay,
so if you haven’t heard, the World Health Organisation (WHO) has said that
burnout can be medically diagnosed.
Which is pretty crazy if you think about
it, working too hard a medical diagnosis? This is where the lines could become
blurred.
Burnout is a serious condition. It
completely changes the way your body functions, your mental state and the way
you process emotions. It’s not something to be scoffed at.
For people who have suffered from
burnout, they will tell you it changed everything for them. The way they
worked, exercised, ate, spent time with family and friends. Literally every
aspect.
I understand a lot of people look at
burnout as something simple to overcome, it really isn’t that simple.
So let’s break it down, what is
burnout?
It is complete physical, mental and
emotional exhaustion from experiencing prolonged stress.
I have mentioned in previous
articles/blog posts that that stress doesn’t always start off as a negative.
For some people, it can be positive.
The WHO has suggested that you get
burnout from overworking. But what are the causes?
I think we have to look at a lot of different facets to get to the answer.
1) Expectations
Expectations
can cause a lot of conflicts if not managed properly. Whether it’s between
managers and employees or the expectations people put on themselves.
Here’s my experience working with
clients who have suffered burnout, they usually suffer from their own
expectations. Their willing to exceed their any expectation.
Now, I’m not saying that’s always a bad
thing. However, we have to look at what cost? For a lot of top performers,
burning out is their worst nightmare. They will have no choice but to slow
down.
On the other hand, what if managers or
employers expectations are too high. This is something I have also seen. Where
there is simply not enough time in the day to physically do the work. People
can bust their butts trying to reach specific deadlines or targets, which are
simply unachievable.
I have had one client say they literally
worked 20 hours straight to reach a deadline. Annnnnd did those hours multiple
times. That is a clear indication that the workload was too high.
Not only that, if you are constantly working towards an unachievable goal/deadline/target, switching off is going to be a problem.
2) The 9-5 is DEAD
What
a dream that was. Coming into work at 9 am and leaving at 5 pm, what a
life.
I have to say I’ve never worked in an
industry where I was able to work 9-5, but hey, it was a thing. Most people I
speak to are working a lot longer than that.
Then with the development of technology,
work hours have dramatically changed. People can check their emails and receive
phones calls at all times of the day.
Technology has given people a lot of
freedom. However, it has also changed the way we work. The hours we work and
how much “downtime” we get.
Not only that, people are programming their brains to react to every sound and vibration their phones make. Creating a new phenomenon where people are always “on”.
People have become incredibly reactionary to their phones. This doesn’t allow them to really switch off if they aren’t proactive about it.
3) Lack of Feeling Accomplished and Satisfied
Okay,
so this is a little follow on from number one. Let’s think about this
logically. If you are unable to hit your goals, targets or hit deadlines
would you feel accomplished or satisfied? I’m going to take a wild guess and
say no.
This is the mental and emotional aspect
of burnout. If you don’t feel satisfied, accomplished or valued continuously,
you will burn out.
A lot of employees who don’t reach their
manager’s expectation (let alone their own) they won’t feel that buzz you get
from succeeding.
Can you imagine never being able to relish in any success? It’s pretty bleak if you ask me.
4) Culture
This
is a HUGE one for a lot of companies. I know countless people who have left
their job burnt out because of the terrible culture.
Working in an environment that’s toxic
is incredibly mentally and emotionally draining.
Trying to hit your targets, deadlines
and goal while managing a toxic work culture won’t keep any good
employee.
What we have to remember is stress has a
very detrimental effect on the body. All of those areas can cause stress day in
and day out. This is what causes burnout. The way responds to stress.
Reducing those stressors is the first
step.
Are they the only causes of burnout? No,
there are a lot of other areas when looking at burn out. It doesn’t always come
from work. This is why people need to recognise the warning signs.
I guess my only concerns with burnout being diagnosable now is what are doctors looking for?
The WHO has said they are looking for:
1)
Depletion in energy
2) Increase in mental distance from
work
3) Reduced professional efficacy
They have also said they need to rule
out other mental health issues. Such as anxiety, adjustment disorders and mood
disorders.
My personal concern is that anxiety can
be a symptom of burnout.
I hope the handbook on burnout from the WHO will be a little more detailed. Those symptoms are quite generic. There also needs to be more clarification around certain areas.
What are some take-home notes?
Burnout
is a complicated illness. There isn’t one solution. There isn’t one
answer.
Companies will need to take a
personalised approach to how to prevent and overcome burnout for their
employees.
Stress is the biggest factor when it
comes to burnout. Finding solutions, investing in education and changing
protocols is important.
